All hail King Mike!

JERILDERIE, Australia (AFP) - If Australian forklift operator Mike Hastings is, as genealogists contend, the rightful heir to the British throne, then he really needs to brush up on his tea-making skills.

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"I reckon I might send Lizzie (Queen Elizabeth II) a bill for back rent, the old girl's family have been living in my bloody castle for the last 500 years" [Hastings said.]

The documentary's historian Michael Jones found documents in Rouen Cathedral he believes show that Edward IV, who ruled from 1461 to 1483, was illegitimate because when he was conceived his parents were 200 kilometres (124 miles) apart.

Edward's "father" Richard of York was fighting the French at Pontoise, while his mother Cecily was five days' march away at Rouen, allegedly enjoying the attentions of an archer, according to Jones' research.

If true, the claim means the crown should have passed on to Richard's second son George, Hastings' direct ancestor.

That's a beautiful response. I love Australians. Just heed my advice, and don't ever try to outdrink one... I wound up with a tattoo that way (long story.)

(Incidentally, Hastings is originally from England, and in fact is the 14th Earl of Loudoun; he emigrated to Australia in 1960, and clearly he has taken to the place.)

HRH Mike, the man who should be king, prefers Aussie bush to Buck Palace (Agence France Press via Yahoo! News)