When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. - Hunter S. Thompson

28 July 2005

Mister Gato emerges from his phonebooth, wearing a red cape...

Giant mice on South Atlantic island 'eating seabird chicks alive' - Yahoo! News:
Giant carnivorous mice on the British-ruled island of Gough in the south Atlantic are eating seabird chicks alive in mass feeding frenzies, threatening several species' survival, a wildlife charity warned.

The house mice, while three times the size of those seen in mainland Britain, are still only one 250th the size of the chicks they attack, the Royal Society for the Protection of Birds (RSPB) said Monday.

The mice, which strike at night in large numbers, are devouring more than one million petrel, shearwater and albatross chicks on Gough Island every year...
Seems to me that I know a stone cold killer who might have a solution to this problem. And he works cheap.

I'm watching you.
Carnivorous mice are the problem.
Meet the solution.


If we could get a battalion-sized unit of Mousinators assembled and moved temporarily onto Gough Island (we'd probably want to make sure they're all spayed and neutered first, so as not to introduce YET ANOTHER non-native species into the fragile ecosystem), I'm betting they'd have the problem under control in short order.

Um, unless they wanted to eat the baby birds too.

Ah, dammit. Never mind.

1 comment:

Laurence said...

I could imagine a squadron of cloned Nardos attacking the mice.

Then there'd be a race of cats with thumbs... and they'd develop nuclear weapons...

Bah. Safer to have nukes in the Nardoans paws than the Iranians.